Half-Dead Mouse
December 5, 2008
Same argument.
It went on and on. For over an hour. It ended with me saying that I was done, and leaving the room. He followed me, harping on something. I said, "Leave me the fuck alone!" and he said, "That's real adult - you're so childish!"
He left the room and complained that he had only wanted one night of relaxation this weekend, "but NO, I can't even do that!" I said, "Yes, it's all my fault." He said, "Well if it isn't your fault, who's is it?"
I didn't say anything else. I had a feeling the peace wouldn't last. Does he expect me to let him insult me without saying anything about it? Does he expect me just to swallow it like I have in the past? Excuse him because he "doesn't do it on purpose" and "didn't mean to hurt me?"
I'm sick of all that. If he doesn't do it on purpose and he doesn't mean to hurt me, then why won't he look at what he's saying and change it? Why does he keep doing the thing that hurts the ones he professes to love when the solution is within HIS grasp?
I'm as at fault as he is for the length of this stupid "talk." Right when I would think I MIGHT be getting through, I was proven wrong by being caught off guard by a smart-ass comment, change of topic, or confabulation about something I had said either recently or months ago.
I feel like a half-dead mouse being batted around by a bored cat.
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