What Can We Do?
I've come to realize that I cannot help my husband realize this problem because he doesn't want to see it. Will is comfortable in his own world - he is the only one who can remove himself from it. Therefore, this site is dedicated to raising awareness about the insidious nature of verbal abuse by sharing my experience as fully as possible.
Fortunately for you and me, we can remove ourselves from the abuser's world (physically and figuratively).
- We can change how we're willing to live.
- We can change our minds about what we're willing to accept or to refuse about ourselves.
- We can change our minds about what we're willing to accept or to refuse from our abusers.
- We can regain healthy attitudes about ourselves, or for some of us, create a healthy attitude from scratch.
We can start by Setting Boundaries that separate us from our abusers.
We can change anything we want, but what I'm looking forward to most is not changing my Self (for a change)! I've spent years trying to fit my big huge Self into the little-bitty box my husband defined for me - I'm NOT doing that ANYMORE!
I hope that those of you who think you may be or once were verbally abused will find validation by reading my journal entries from the first time I thought something may be wrong through today. I hope that you can find something in my journey that helps you realize that if abuse is happening to you, then you're not imagining it, making it up, or being a drama queen.
I hope you come to realize that your feeling that "something is wrong" deserves exploration even if your abuser denies it. I hope you remember a time in which you faced the world without labels, without self-defeating attitudes, and without another person's strangling hold suffocating your voice.
I hope we both regain our freedom to be, think, do, say, and believe the things we know are right for our Selves.
copyright 2009 verbal abuse journals; all rights reserved.